Is there really such thing as fate or destiny?

Or are they both some kinda lame bullshit that some sappy romantic made up way back when? We all have that one person, man or woman, that has a certain effect on us….you know the effect I’m referring to. The effect where you get all flustered in their presence, your brain wants to say all these things but the words that come out are all gibberish. And then you wonder what the hell just happened when you’re usually so confident and sure of yourself….but that ONE person makes you weak in the knees, ties your tongue in a knot, and just takes your breath away! Is it destiny or fate that brought you together? Is it the same thing that continues to bring you together when you least expect it?

I have that ONE person. I knew the very first time I laid eyes on him that he was going to be something to me…and it scared the crap outta me because I wasn’t ready for anything…I was busy figuring myself out. When I first saw him, I remember feeling this jolt of whatever it was….”here’s your fate” kind of thing, maybe? I didn’t have the nerve to say hello….I just stared out of the corner of my eye. Then we went our separate ways only to run into each again. This time it was different…he actually spoke to me!! He introduced himself to me and I was giddy because this man that I had briefly come across was actually TALKING TO ME!! Wouldn’t you know it, I couldn’t understand him because he had an accent….not only was he handsome and sexy but he had an accent that made you want to rip your clothes off with a single word!! Guess what happened…..yep, I got tongue-tied and I think I said something ridiculous…..see, it was so ridiculous I don’t want to remember!

After that second chance meeting, I would run into him every now and then and completely melt! I’d go home and replay our interaction and wonder why he had such an effect on me. Is it fate? Is it destiny? Is he supposed to be in my life? Am I supposed to be in his? What is the purpose of this budding friendship that would soon turn into a relationship? Only the author of this chapter knows the reasons…..I’m not the author, I am just a character in this play that is my life.

One day I received a phone call….it was him. Inviting me to meet him and go for a walk. As I drove to meet him I was so nervous! And then I arrived at our meeting point and all I could do was smile….he was nervous, too!! We walked in the woods and talked….somehow the nervousness went away. He held my hand….I felt so small next to him and my hand fit perfectly in his. Welcome to your destiny, my girl…..jump in feet first, by all means!! If you jump in head first, you probably wouldn’t have jumped!! This man….oh my goodness!! He wrapped me around his finger to the point I lived and breathed him!! Every time I turned around I sensed him…his smell permanently embedded in my sense of smell! THIS MAN!

Well, as fate would have it we had this beautiful, whirlwind, relationship that was both loving, passionate, and frustrating! He had issues that I couldn’t help him with….ultimately leading us to part ways. I didn’t want to be with anyone else after this….relationships make things more complicated. I’ve thought of him every now and then, looked for his car, thought I saw him once….and yes my heart jumped….I realized it wasn’t him. So, my fate was to carry on with my life, my plans, my story. He was gone to live his life and sort his crap out and I was living my life.

And then, fate rears her head again! Fate, destiny, whatever you wanna call it, is a tricky, meddling annoyance when you’re comfortable and you know where you’re going, what you’re supposed to be doing!! It was a beautiful, sunny day and I was out walking….in my own head as I was listening to music and not caring about anyone or anything around me. I feel a tap on my shoulder, startled, I turn and there he is. His smell in my nose, his presence soaking into my being, his nearness intoxicating as I realize that he is standing right in front of me! I stumble on my words…..he tells me I look good….tells me he thinks of me….he reads my blog…..and I realize I am happy to see him.

Is this our destiny? Our fate? To teasingly remind one another of the chemistry between us only to never have it develop into something more? What is it? Where is this supposed to go?

Somewhere there is a book that is already written for each one of us. And just like any good book, there are twists and turns, there are mysteries, there is love, friendship, sadness, happiness…..this is our Life Book. Who knows what will happen now…..stay tuned…maybe another chapter will be written. I think the most important lesson is don’t be afraid to live your life….run towards your fate….embrace your destiny.